Everyone has their own concept of what "monogamy" means - and most people assume their partners and spouses are on the same page. Couples may assume that they are monogamous, but never discuss exactly what the monogamy agreement means to them. What happens when this implicit agreement is broken? After infidelity, relationships can become strained as both partners lose trust and faith in each other. "The New Monogamy" offers a way out of these difficulties for couples struggling to stay together after infidelity. Couples make these implicit assumptions and agreements explicit so that each partner knows exactly what is expected of them in the future and what they can expect from their partner. Author Tammy Nelson helps couples regain trust, romance, and intimacy after infidelity by redefining the monogamy contract. The new monogamy contract is an explicit relationship agreement created after the affair that allows each partner to openly, honestly, and safely share their desires, expectations, and limitations. This agreement does not create an open marriage, but rather, an open conversation wherein each partner can have a say in setting the ground rules for their relationship.
The book first helps couples rebuild trust after the affair, then engages in a series of Imago dialogues based on questions about what each partner really wants in the relationship, not what you think you should want or what a partner wants you to want. "The New Monogamy" includes questionnaires, checklists, and candid questions for partners to ask that help welcome complete honesty and trust back into the relationship. Then, the book helps couples make an erotic recovery from infidelity by addressing erotic problems that may surface and offers advice for helping couples return to desiring and trusting one another. After an affair, it's impossible to go back to the way relationship was before, but this book offers the chance for a new beginning.
Tammy Nelson, presents, a revolutionary approach to healing a relationship after infidelity.
"At a time when life can feel so murky and chaotic, along comes Tammy Nelson with this guidebook.... "The New Monogamy" is as crisp and clear as it is hopeful and realistic. A book to open again and again."
--Esther Perel, author of "Mating in Captivity"
Tammy Nelson, PhD, has worked as a psychotherapist for over fifteen years. She is executive director and co-founder of the Centre for Healing and Recovery in Norwalk, CT, and co director and cofounder of the Ridgefield Centre for Families and Children in Ridgefield, CT. Nelson is a licensed professional counsellor, a registered art therapist, a licensed alcohol and drug counsellor, and a certified imago relationships therapist. She resides in the New York City area, where she works in her private practice treating anorexia, bulimia, and other eating disorders using group and expressive therapy.